I find myself apologizing for Blake a lot. I say, "Sorry, he's shy" when someone tries to talk to him, and he fusses and hides. But recently, I started wondering why I was apologizing. What is wrong with being shy? Of course as adults, we know that even though we are shy, it's polite to say hello back to someone when they try to engage in conversation. But Blake doesn't know that. All he knows is that he doesn't like it when someone he doesn't know tries to talk to him. He doesn't like when someone gets too close to his personal space. He's an introvert, and he's shy. And that's okay!
I was actually far worse than him at this age with the same things. I turned out alright. But we are trying to work with Blake about how to express how he's feeling. I am trying to teach him words like "overwhelmed" so that when we have a situation like his birthday party where there were just too many people for him, he will be able to tell me that is how he's feeling instead of just screaming. We are doing our best to help him, but it can be tough sometimes. Blake had a tantrum for about 20 minutes or so the other day because I put a bandaid on his cut. He didn't want a bandaid on his cut. He doesn't speak well enough to even say that, so he just screamed and tried to rip it off. Today he had a tantrum because someone handed him a juice box, and it fell to the floor when he refused to hold it himself. Of course toddlers will have random tantrums over absolutely nothing, so oh well.
Being shy and introverted is nothing to apologize for. Blake gets overwhelmed when there are too many people around, especially when they are all trying to talk to him. He has never been one to smile and wave at strangers, and he doesn't like to accept a sticker from the well-intentioned grocery store clerks. It might sound silly, but it was only recently that I understood that Blake is a human with a personality just like me. I guess it didn't occur to me that a child could be introverted.
Now if only I could carry around a sign all the time that said, "Please don't get in my son's face" we would be all good. But since I can't do that, I still find myself telling people that he's shy, but I have taken out the "I'm sorry" part of it because there's nothing wrong with my son. He hasn't done anything wrong, he just doesn't like talking to strangers. That's really not the worst thing ever. Chances are, Blake will not be accepting any candy from strangers.
