Mistreating your parents is kind of a crazy thing because if you don't treat your parents right, do you think your kids will learn to treat YOU right as THEIR parent? If your parents are elderly and need taken care of, you do it. If your parent needs a place to live and food to eat because they don't have enough money for their own place, house them and feed them! (Considering that they did that for you for 18 years or however long, I think it's the least you can do!) These kinds of things are a great example to our own children because it teaches them how to take care of others who are in need, especially our family. I never once considered that I wouldn't take care of my parents if someday they need me to. That's just what it means to honor my parents during that stage of our lives. I sure hope that my kids will learn the same lesson and take care of me someday! Watch out, Blake, I'm living until at least 90!
In light of other recent events in Jess Rieger Land, I wonder what our children are learning about the importance of marriage. Are our children learning that it's important to fight for your marriage and to keep your family together? Or are they learning to bottle up emotions, don't talk about problems, don't work through things. This is a huge kick in the butt for me because it's easy to forget about your spouse when you have a little one who is so dependent on you. It's easy for me to forget that TJ is dependent on me, too. THIS is when you have to fight for marriage! You BOTH have to fight to keep your relationship strong. I want Blake to learn that marriage is a lifelong commitment, and it's not a decision you go into lightly. Jesus forbids divorce for a good reason. It damages the couple in serious ways, but it damages the children in huge ways, even if they're already adults when it happens. God is challenging me to look at my everyday interactions with TJ as something for or against my marriage. It's the little things that either build up my spouse and our marriage or tear it down, brick by brick. And it's these little things that my children are going to observe and take note that this is how you treat your wife or husband and this is what a marriage looks like. I'm praying that, by God's grace, they will see more good example than bad. And when they do see a bad example, it will be followed by an example of grace and forgiveness.
All of this comes off as quite a rant because I have a lot of emotions going into this from situations with friends and family, as I mentioned. But these situations break my heart so much because of the children who are observing these bad examples. And I doubt that anyone reading this is cruel to their parents, and I hope that your marriage is not headed towards divorce. BUT the point is that it's the little interactions with your spouse and your parents that show your children what it means to honor and respect and be committed! Writing a good story with your relationships teaches your children how to have deep, meaningful relationships themselves. As small children, we choose who their friends are. But as time goes on, they will choose their own friends and form their own relationships. May we lead by example so that they choose friends and relationships that build up, rather than tear down.
