the bar has been set high

i type this entry on my laptop one letter at a time with one hand. this is how i type most of the time now as i multi-task with nursing. it drives me nuts to type so slowly and sloppily, but it's either this or nothing! anyway, today i want to sing my husband's praises. i knew thar tj would be an amazing farther. but i guess i didn't consider how he would, simultaneously, continue to be a great husband to me.

as i discussed in my previous entry, i have really been struggling with baby blues. this scares tj because we are not sure how much "blues" is normal. there have been nights that i just can't stop crying, in the midst of blake having a crying fit. tj held blake in one arm and me on the other. tj has been so patient with me and has picked up some of my slack, like washing dishes, in addition to keeping up with his 50 hour work week.

when we brought blake home, we started formula feeding from bottles since nursing wasn't going well, so tj and i took turns feeding him. i got used to having a chance to sleep through a feeding at night, so when i went back to breastfeeding, it was difficult for me to imagine being the only feeder. now, if timing works out, tj gives blake a bottle around 11 or so, while i go to bed and get a head start on sleep. it makes a huge difference. he sacrifices his own sleep so i can sleep.

i know tj is exhausted from carrying the responsibility of making sure i'm okay, making sure blake is cared for, and trying to take care of himself. he has proven himself  to be a true hero to our family, and i'm confident he will continue to be our hero. tj has set the bar has set high for fathers and husbands everywhere, and i am so thankful. other family and friends have been very supportive and helpful, but there is nothing like my husband's mere presence to calm me and make me feel safe.

tonight, we are going on our first date night since blake's birth. i kind of thought it might be too soon, but the doctor recommended it because of my baby blues. i hope it will be a nice chance to get rejuvenated and reconnect with tj. i miss being just us, and i'm so jealous for uninterrupted time with him.